Let’s talk about Fatherhood

What does it take to be a good father? The same virtues desired by society for a good father can be found in the man who supports his wife in using the Billings Ovulation Method® of natural fertility awareness. This Method is used in planning family size together and for her reproductive and general health.

It can be noted that since the 1980s, some sitcoms and movies have portrayed the adult male of the house as a buffoon, incapable of leading the family. Examples of this include shows such as The Simpson’s, Married with Children, Home Improvement etc. Many men and women have unfortunately been influenced by the entertainment industry over the last 30 years, adding to what had already been trending. The man is no longer viewed as a role model in the home.

Following the teachings of the Church however and applying the gifts of the Holy Spirit to our daily lives, men can recapture the position. As a protector and provider for the family, the man must take the lead in showing good example to the entire household in many aspects of family life.

He must be compassionate to the physical and emotional needs of his wife and, by extension, any children that result out of their love. He must demonstrate respect to his family through his words and actions and by extension the wider society.

He must lead when it comes to self-discipline and the correction of any children and be careful not to overrule the wife. Instead they should work as a team, especially when it comes to child correction. He must be committed to his role as a provider for and a protector of his family.

The FIFA World Cup is going on now and many men will be taking every opportunity to look at as many matches as possible. This can be a wonderful opportunity for bonding within the home through clean fun.

One must remember that it would be very easy to get lost in the viewing of the matches. The virtue of temperance or moderation would most probably have to be practised, as one can be tempted to overindulge in the viewing of the World Cup.

He must look out for not only his health, but also his family’s health, making sure they seek medical attention when needed. The Billings Method can provide valuable information for medical diagnosis of reproductive illness and even her general health management, thus helping him safeguard his wife’s health.

“In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body” (Eph 5:28–30).

All these virtues, as well as patience, are exercised when a couple uses the Billings Method. The Method requires times of waiting (for physical intimacy), allowing for the growth and practice of the virtue of patience.

When the couple can return to the marital embrace, they experience another honeymoon so it is well worth the wait! Some may argue that that is denying a natural urge or desire, but if one were to have their favourite food every day, would that food remain special?

Let us build up fathers and place them again as a leader of the domestic Church (the home) and not follow bad example but follow St Joseph and our Lord’s good example.

St Joseph is known as ‘The Protector’ because of his obedience to God in protecting Jesus and Mary.  He is known as the patron saint of the worker and we can ask him to intercede for work to provide for each family.

Our Lord Jesus showed men how to be present and faithful leaders in the household: “and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Mt 28:20).

BOMA-TT is both an affiliate of WOOMB International in Australia and a Ministry of the Archdiocesan Family Life Commission (AFLC). BOMA-TT is active throughout the length and breadth of this country advocating for the natural method of fertility awareness and regulation for family planning and for monitoring women’s health. Lead advocate and Coordinator, Pauline Phelps may be reached at (868) 384-1659 or email naturalfertility@catholictt.org or billingstt@gmail.com