Beyond ‘first choice’

By Fr Robert Christo, Vicar for Communications

The Secondary Entrance Assessment (SEA) results are out—and once again, Trinidad and Tobago is split between celebration, silent heartbreak, and sleepless nights. In many homes, one exam is treated as a verdict on a child’s destiny. Some are praised for getting their “first choice,” while others quietly absorb the shame of being “zoned” or labelled as the ones who “did not get first choice”—a stigma that lingers into adulthood, especially when someone asks, “Which school yuh went to?”

But let’s be clear: an exam cannot define a person’s worth. We are each made in the image and likeness of God. Our value isn’t measured by a school’s prestige but by our Creator, who sees our lives as stories unfolding gradually—not as fixed outcomes.

The pressure, the pain, and the trauma

Every year, I  hear stories of anxiety, diarrhoea (after first-time special breakfast), insomnia, and panic before the exam. This year, I heard reports of irregularities and late starts at some centres, further traumatising children already stretched to their emotional limits. One child  asked me, “Why are big people so stressed about where I go to school?”

Even worse, I buried a child who took his life after SEA. His note read: “I wanted to be a good child. They wanted me to be a bright child.” These are the unbearable burdens placed on tiny shoulders. I too pain.

Some parents—though well-meaning—push their children beyond what they can realistically handle. Teachers work assiduously and sometimes advise a balance, but parents still choose only top-tier schools, hoping the child will “get in.”

When this doesn’t happen, the child becomes demotivated, teachers feel undermined, and frustration fills the community.

We must see not just potential, but capacity—and make decisions grounded in love and reality, not pressure and image.

Misunderstood expectations: the 20 per cent denominational rule

Some parents pin their hopes on the 20 per cent denominational allocation (a growing fad) to prestige schools, believing that church membership or Baptism alone guarantees entry.

But that’s a myth. Each school receives hundreds of applications and can only choose a handful—often prioritising active church life, prior engagement, and even sibling attendance.

Being Catholic or Anglican doesn’t automatically mean your child gets in. And when expectations are built on misunderstanding, disappointment is inevitable—and the children pay the emotional price.

What really matters

Former Archbishop Joseph Harris CSSp once said the SEA system “does violence to children.” No holidays. No play. Just lessons and anxiety. But children need time to grow.

A wise theologian reminds us: hearts are not converted by fear, but by truth, fun, goodness, beauty, and joy. Education must include music, spirituality, humour, community, and wonder—not just rankings.

My own father once told me, “Pass or fail, you’ll get your bicycle.” That kind of unconditional love gave me the courage to flourish. Every child deserves that.

A path forward: parents, teachers, Church

Parents: Affirm your child’s worth beyond results. Pray with them. Be present. Celebrate effort. See who they are, not just what they produce.

Teachers: teach ethically. Avoid profiting from pressure. Create spaces of hope, not anxiety. Recognise when the classroom becomes sanctuary.

Church: Speak into this space. Offer retreats, formation, pastoral care. Help children know they are loved, whether they pass, fail, or bloom later.

Let’s raise children not just for first choice, but for fullness of life. The real question isn’t “Which school yuh went to?” but “Who are you becoming?”