Two Hearts as One’ – true love

This article is a monthly continuation of Dr Evelyn Billings’ talk ‘Two Hearts as One’. In this excerpt below Dr Billings outlines what “true love” entails.

The Billings Ovulation Method® involves times of waiting or abstinence. In real love, each woman is worth the wait and the truth about the couple relationship comes to light in the practice of this Method.

“In the application of the Rules of the Billings Ovulation Method®, after the woman has recorded her signs of fertility, we present the various phases of the cycle positively, so that abstinence which to many people has a negative sound, develops a positive sense of the value of fertility, which can be the source of new life.

So many young people coming for instruction consider the avoidance of pregnancy to be the biggest hurdle they will find in marriage. Listening to their friends, they absorb many negative attitudes to babies.

It is sad but true that this has been instilled from schooldays where some of the feminist teachers see babies as the second greatest obstruction to liberation, the first being their own femininity.

Therefore, part of the teaching is to bring to the fore the happiness possible in marriage. Good communication is initiated through the application of the Method.

Loving cooperation develops and if the fertile phase is presented as a source of love and joy in the possible child, use of the Method blossoms into a generosity which soon comes to include the baby.

If the fertile time continues to be seen as imposing abstinence and therefore an imposition of restriction, the infertile time, impatiently awaited also become negative and is seen as “all that is left” and one hears remarks like “when we can, we don’t want to”.

This is then translated by adversaries of natural family planning as unnatural, with the presumption that the only time a woman enjoys physical satisfaction is when it is forbidden at the fertile time.

All those who teach natural family planning know that women are not governed by hormones. They best enjoy the physical sexual relationship when the beloved, by his constant demonstration of love in so many considerate ways, lets his wife know that she is loved not solely for the delight she can give him but for her whole self, her mind, her integrity, accomplishments and her beauty. Then, in this climate of constant love their physical happiness is complete no matter what the phase of the cycle.

They are both in accord with the decisions made. They are humanly in tune in mind, in body and in love. This is natural for human beings because they alone are capable of knowing, choosing and loving. They are in tune not only with Nature, but with the Lord of Nature who loves them.

Many times, particularly nowadays, couples come for instruction unmarried, with the problem of inconvenient fertility, suffering from side-effects of contraception, sometimes following abortion, and asking for what they call, “this natural method of contraception”.

We teach them, initially refraining from explaining that a natural method is not a method of contraception. If there is no true bond between them, and the relationship is holding together simply because of the genital activity, any restriction of intercourse may be unacceptable, and they will soon separate.

It is the woman who is first to realise how she has been exploited. She soon comes to see herself differently and to realise her womanliness in the signs her body is giving her.

In future, she is more likely to make a wiser choice, to command respect and recognition for what she really is, and hopefully find and commit herself in marriage with her true love.”

Conclusion in next month’s column.

BOMA-TT Phone or WhatsApp:

384-1659

Email: naturalfertility@catholictt.org or billingstt@gmail.com

Local Website: billingstt.com

International Websites: woombinternational.org

or billings.life