2024 Dry Season outlook
January 17, 2024
What kind of society do we want?
January 17, 2024
By Daniel Francis
She stood up and said that she did not matter and moved to the back of the class – a moment that has stayed with me for years. I was asked to come into a school and chat with kids about their goals and dreams.
Typically, some kids do not pay attention at all because there is not much I can do to get them to care. So, I was accustomed to a level of pushback, but this student in particular was going above and beyond to make sure I knew that she did not care about my efforts.
She was sitting right at the front and put her head down on the table as I conversed with the other students. We reached a portion of the session where I asked the students to talk about their goals and I could not take her behaviour anymore.
I asked her to answer the question and she responded with “I do not matter” and proceeded to move to the back of the class in a grand spectacle. I came to learn that the student in question was essentially raising her younger siblings as her parents worked such long hours and were suspected of negligence.
I sympathised with her and understood why an exercise like the one I was running felt like a waste of time. She felt like she had no options and little freedom of her own, so why even try?
I recently remembered this young student’s words as I was having an intense argument with one of my friends. She has always been a bit troubled and that came as a result of her difficult upbringing.
We got into intense arguments from time to time because she has a noticeably short fuse. She had crossed a line this time and I had to voice my disappointment. However, no matter what I said she could not see past her anger and there was no point in continuing the argument. The entire interaction aggravated me to no end, and I could not help but judge my friend in that moment.
As I began calming down, I recalled the memory of what the young student had said to me but at the time I could not understand why God would bring this memory to the forefront of my mind so suddenly.
Upon further reflection, it became apparent to me. God wanted me to see that the young girl and my friend were the same. My friend could easily be the adult version of that young student.
With even further reflection, I noticed that both their stories were similar. My friend, the eldest sibling of her younger brother and sister, was the one to raise them because her parents were mostly absent. I continued along this line of reflection, and it became clear that I should have taken a stance of understanding as opposed to anger and judgement.
It is easy to take the life you have for granted. I was blessed to have my parents present in my life and a healthy environment to play, grow, and learn. Not everyone was afforded this environment. As a result, they faced challenges growing up that some cannot even fathom.
Imagine how these experiences have shaped their view of relationships, religion, and other aspects of life.
When you are forced to live in survival mode for so long, what may seem reasonable to someone in that mode may not seem reasonable to someone else. Of course, as adults, we are each called to take responsibility for our actions, but we could all use a helping hand in that regard.
I saw this as a sign that God was calling me to be a beacon of understanding in their life when they have been met with so much adversity. God is calling all of us to not judge and to take a position of understanding.
Think back to the last altercation you had where you chose to judge rather than understand someone. What could you have done differently? Remind yourself of this the next time you are in a similar position.
As children of God, we should strive to extend a helping hand to those we come into contact with who may be troubled, and not be quick to judge.
Daniel Francis is a millennial helping other millennials. He is a two-time author of the books The Millennial Mind and The Millennial Experience, and an entrepreneur. Over the past four years, he has served as a Personal Development Coach whose work targets Millennials and helps them tap into their full potential. He is also a Self-publishing coach and has guided hundreds on self-publishing their book successfully.
IG: rebitlimited
LinkedIn: Daniel Francis
