What ‘a diamond’ looks like

Janet and Hugh Ramsey celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary on October 26. Their daughter, Michele Mohammed, pays tribute.

What does 60 years of marriage look like to me? Some days, it involves quarrelling over the pot of callaloo on a Sunday morning, about who is taking too long to cut up the leaves, to who is not stirring the pot properly, to who added too much salt…

It is laughing by the end of that day, culminating in serenity, marked by the rhythmic rocking of their chairs on the porch of their Pelham Street home.

Every day, it is the familiar sight of rosary beads slipping through their fingers as they bring before God each and every member of the family, as night begins to fall…

Some days, it is the nursing each other back to health, or the waiting outside a hospital door, hoping for the other to come home…

Every day, it is each one ensuring that the other one takes his or her dose of tablets, followed by the recording of each other’s blood pressure.

Some days, it is the shedding of tears, saying I am sorry, granting forgiveness.

All of this and more define for me what 60 years of marriage looks like. Throughout the years, my siblings and I would watch our parents do without some material things just so that we could have…

We would watch them feed the less fortunate, even up to today. I often wonder where all this food comes from when people come asking for food. “It multiplies” mum would say, just as Jesus multiplied the fish and loaves.

Sixty years of marriage is indeed a very long time. So how did they meet?

Mum and dad met so many years ago while dad was a member of the Legion of Mary, and he came to my mum’s family home to discuss praying the rosary. He was at that time considering joining the Seminary and spent weekends at Mount St Benedict trying to determine his calling. Little did he know that God was calling him to enter another Sacrament, just as beautiful and fulfilling.

Now, I don’t want to say that he gave up on his dream of becoming a seminarian when he saw mum for the first time, wearing short pants and with flour on her hands as she was about to bake with her mum, but I do believe he was truly smitten.

Before he knew it, he found himself writing letters to her from Mount St Benedict, until that special letter to her parents to ask her hand in marriage.

Out of the joining of these two beautiful souls on the October 26, 1963, came seven children: Christopher, Michael, Michele, Christiana, Camille, Melissa, and Colin, and nine grandchildren: Shane, Kieran, Lauren, Justin, Kristen, Isabella, Kaitlyn, Celia, and Alec.

Added to the family are the wonderful in-laws: Tony, Sean, Ronnie, Liz, and Audra, all of whom contribute to the beautiful tapestry of their lives.

My parents’ dream now is to see the completion of the renovation of their beloved St Francis RC, Belmont, where they married 60 years ago.

So what does 60 years of marriage look like to me? In a nutshell, it is two people, a little less steady on their feet now, holding each other’s hands, while holding on to God and His Mother Mary, as they move along in faith, inspired by the great love they have for one another and for each of their children and grandchildren, while still finding room in their hearts to love the less fortunate.