Intimacy (Verbal and Emotional Communication)

We have been taught from the Theology of the Body that we were made for intimacy— with God and with others. Intimacy is the closeness between two people in personal relationships, a mingling of souls and a sharing of mind and hearts. We were designed to connect in closeness with another, with whom we’ve grown to deeply care for and feel more and more comfortable during your times together – this is something we all long for because it’s how God made us.

Intimacy is another aspect of our lives that we must work towards within ourselves and model for our children. Intimacy is not only a physical closeness, but a verbal and emotional one. Of course, communicating our closeness through physical affections may come naturally and easily when your love for each other is bursting at the seams because of God’s divine love gifted to you. For example,  a warm embrace, holding of a hand and a gentle good morning kiss can be expressed appropriately in the household.

According to Greg and Lisa Popcak’s Beyond the Birds and the Bees, “Men and women should work to be as affectionate with each as much as possible while retaining a sense of propriety”.  Fostering healthy verbal and emotional intimacy, on the other hand, requires us couples to take the necessary time-out to communicate our closeness in the form of our thoughts and feelings for each other to our dreams and hopes for our present and future, to our interests and roles as husband and wife. An open, honest, respectful and loving conversation to be had as much as we can, as best as possible.

Modelling healthy intimacy for our children means we teach both appropriate physical affections and healthy communication through our emotions. It is important that we teach our children that their emotions have e a name, have validity and have to be preserved. We are asking them to tell us how they feel and assist them in identifying their feelings that cause struggle. It is also important to teach them not only how to share their thoughts and feelings but how to listen to others who are sharing. Intimacy is a two-way street. Once a child has been taught and shown the appropriate connection and closeness in intimacy, they should reflect the same in their own healthy and holy sexuality.