We are Wounded Healers

The six-week series on the ‘Wounded Healer’ hosted by the Archdiocesan Family Life Commission ended on November 10. Over 80 married couples of varying ages participated. Here is a sharing from a participant.

How shall I know him? He is sitting among the poor, covered with wounds but he unbinds one at a time and binds it up again saying to himself, perhaps I shall be needed: if so, I must be always ready as not to delay for a moment.

To be poor in Spirit is to take time to heal by letting go of all the hurts, pain, and shame one by one. It takes time, courage, facing fears, letting go and moving forward, using each wound in service to others. The scars are not there to remind us of the pain and shame but to reveal that we are healed. We are Wounded Healers. We have transcended the pain and shame to become a living flame, a flame of love.

The mission starts in the domestic Church, the family. It is a divine flow, in husband, wife, children. The husband is the head of the wife, the wife submits to her husband and the children obey their parents.

We are both wounded and in need of healing. God sees our imperfections and He still loves us, so we do not need to hide. Archbishop Jason said, “My spouse’s woundedness is going to help me be holy.” This was liberating for my soul. I see his woundedness not as a problem to resist but a process to embrace as a precious gift to my soul.

In this experience, what surfaced for me is loneliness. I am married with five children and you would think I should not be lonely. My loneliness comes from a deep desire to do God’s will as a couple. We do other things together but this one thing, “ministry together”, is a longing in my soul.

The last night I felt it the most and the loneliness was glaring in my face. I was led by the Spirit to read about personal loneliness and these words freed my soul.

“The Christian way of life does not take away our loneliness; it protects and cherishes it as a precious gift.” I am going to use the wound of loneliness as a gift in service to others.

“Perhaps the painful awareness of loneliness is an invitation to transcend our limitations and look beyond the boundaries of our existence.”

This has been a good learning experience and with the help of the Discerning Tool Kit we are positioned to succeed in missioning the domestic Church.